Hello One Thousand Subscribers! What the Deuce are You Doing Here?

Photo by Joe Loong via Flickr

Yesterday I reached a pinnacle—a difficult and craggy height the likes of which could only be dreamt of when I first pressed “Publish” on WordPress.

Yes, it is true: I now have one thousand WordPress subscribers. (That’s you! Hooray!)

The first few hundred accumulated quietly. Like dust in a corner, or receipts in a wallet, or kittens in a house where the mama cat never gets fixed and is very friendly. It was calm, and nice, and only a little hairy. Then some big, partly exciting, partly terrifying jumps came with the two times I got on Freshly Pressed (Thanks FP editors!). And then?

Then, things got a little weird.

I started getting a bunch of subscribers every day. Like five. Or ten. And some of them, well…I kinda wonder what they’re doing here. (Not you, of course. You’re here on purpose, right?) Like all the people whose blogs are in a different language. My humor’s a little bumpy in English; I can only imagine what kind of a loon I sound like in translation. And then there are the fashion blogs (did you not see this, people? You will find no fashion here.). And, I dunno…just a bunch of randos. Perhaps I have charmed all one thousand of you with my wit and made-up words. It’s possible. Or perhaps there’s some sort of internet scam in which you charm me with your subscription, and then I end up being a drug mule for you or something. (Please know I’d make a terrible drug mule—breaking rules makes me very, very nervous. I use my signal every single time. Even when no cars are around. That type o’ gal is not cut out for the drug muling life.)

So, to quell my curiosity, while also seizing the opportunity to press a new button I found in my WordPress post editor, I thought I’d do a poll! It’ll be enlightening and entertaining for all involved. Plus…more buttons!

Here we go:


A million snuggles to all of you for making me feel like I’m not sending my words into the abyss. I’ll keep writing if you keep reading. Deal? Deal.

Hello One Thousand Subscribers! What the Deuce are You Doing Here?

13 thoughts on “Hello One Thousand Subscribers! What the Deuce are You Doing Here?

  1. Coo-ee! Melanie-! Where the deuce have you disappeared to? Okay, so a few random people are slightly addicted to your wonderful party streamers of occasionally made up words… it’s no biggie. Can you just pretend that you’re writing only for me? I miss ya.


    1. Aww…I miss you lovely readers too.

      Remember that pregnancy post from a while back? Well, it came from personal experience and (perhaps not surprisingly) preceded the arrival of an actual, real person. A tiny monster person who is eating all my time and sanity. In a cute way.

      Even so, I’ve got a couple posts in the works. Apologies if they end up all gibberish and photos of poi.


      1. Well dang, congrats! And say no more. Say. No. More. Until you’re ready & tiny baby parasite lets you retain a bit of sanity. And stop reading this and go and get some sleep already.:)


  2. What the…?
    So I was getting my blog ready for the day (it publishes on Wednesdays, and all) and I noticed on my Reader that WordPress was suggesting I follow you and I said, “I’ve been following her for a year, now, WP. We’re Lawsbians. We follow each other. Support, yo” and WP said, “No, that’s not true” I said, “Yes it is, stupid. I get her posts in my inbox.” and it said, “Doesn’t matter. You’re not following her here.” and I said, “I’m pretty sure I am.” and it said, “Why don’t you click on her name and find out.” so I said, “FINE! I WILL! JERK!” and then I did and…I wasn’t following you through WordPress which means WordPress was right and I owe it an apology only I’m not giving it one because I am still angry at it for a few other things so I think I’ll just gunnysack it all and blow up at it one day for no actual reason.
    So now I”m another WP follower. Sorry about that. I thought I already was.😦 But I am wearing my smoking jacket, so there’s that.


      1. I was out of chocolate.
        I always love WordPress. Except for when we argue. Then I tell it I hate it. Obviously, though, it doesn’t care. It’s like we have a very one-sided relationship in which I do all the work. Looks like it may be time for another discussion with WP because I feel the irritation rising.


  3. Congrats! I was Fresh Pressed last month and keep getting the loads of random subscribers myself, which kind of freaks me out. I’m pretty sure they’re not actually reading what I write–mostly because they’re probably too busy searching “squirrels in Victoria’s Secret panties” (true search term) but I suppose it’s still flattering, no?

    But you…you! All your subscribers are bound to be witty, intelligent readers who come here for engaging discourse and a laugh or two. Congrats!


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